Reality check

Sometimes I feel like my life has become so wrapped up in Stefani's dream that I may not be seeing the forest for the trees.

Until recently I could never really understand hockey moms who synched their lives with the arena schedule. Boy do I ever understand now!

Helping Stefani out is like having another job ... manager, coach, stylist, chaperone and driver. Check emails daily, liaise with agent, self-submit, accept offers, refuse others, send thank-you notes, chase after footage, maintain the schedule, practice lines ... Stefani, the actor, is a business I manage.

But I'm also a mother ... to Stef ... and to a handful of others. It's a balancing act that is difficult at times to maintain.

I'm always reminding myself that even when the others ask about Stefani ... I have to tone it down a bit or brush things off ... because they can't help but compare and feel "neglected". I'm sure each of them has wondered why I wasn't committed to the business of them in the same way. Not that any of them really ever wanted to be an actor ... though Nicole did want to be a model ... I even took her to a few agencies ... but she was too short, and still is too short. But try and tell that to raw emotional sibling rivalry.

Blogging has helped because I can toot Stefani's horn or fret and wonder what I should do ... without it upsetting the apple carts around me.